Went shopping on the way home today. Nothing major on the menu as clearly it’s the end of the month. In addition it’s November so I’m not really “on it” when it comes to booze. But you know something is coming as last time I blogged about shopping the lass thought I was an air hostess …
Anyway, tonight I sneaked away from work early – two reasons. Well, three.
1. I got in at quarter to 9. Early. Fact.
2. I wanted to do my shopping out of crazy shopping hours
3. I wanted to sneak off early as my brain was numb after hours of technical briefings in my new(ish) job …
So … got to Morrisons (I loathe that this supermarket doesn’t have an apostrophe. Sainsbury’s is called Sainsbury’s but, I checked, Morrisons is not called Morrison’s, so we can assume it doesn’t belong to the former front man of The Doors (on my dead celeb shag list) or any living man or woman with the surname Morrison. It annoys me but it’s close to home so I’ll deal with it. For now.)
Anyway, I’m at Morrisons. Or Im at Morrisons. Bleugh. Apostrophes. I need milk and bread. Milk and bread. Repeat that as a mantra until checkout. Do not pass chocolate oranges, do not collect discounted booze.
OK, so I bought 2 chocolate oranges. But this is a long-term investment. The fact that they are still intact is a tribute to my self control. Or my lack of interest in chocolate. OK, it’s the latter.
It all went very well. Milk. Bread. Cat litter. Pasta sauce (easy meal) … can I seriously be held responsible if, on the way to the till, I see my favourite white wine at half price. Not just at half price, also sold by the case for ease of … er … putting in my car? Shit. OK, so I picked up some wine. It’s HALF PRICE. What do you expect me to do? Anyway, got to the till. Typically the cases are not programmed into it so I had to go back to the wine aisle to pick up a bottle for bar coding. Felt a bit nervous by now. Buying a case felt a bit decadent. “This will keep me ’til Christmas” I giggled nervously.
Checkout lass (she may have been called Mary, I’m not sure, I believe checkout staff are these days) looked me up and down. Literally stopped work and took a good look. Paused. (Snort) “Yeah, like it’s going to last that long?”
Sorry, when did I ask for an opinion on my alcohol consumption from the Morrisons (Morrison’s) checkout?
OK so admittedly I was already the best part down the first bottle out of the case. What’s the problem? Parents always open packs of sweets, crisps and cakes while they walk around supermarkets to keep their various offspring quiet … and yet there’s now an issue with me having a couple of swigs of wine? At least I took my half empty bottle to the till instead of putting it back on the shelf and replacing it with a full one like I’ve seen some parents doing with the crisps and sweets. Damn, missed a trick there …
A couple of really good friends moved in down the road from me yesterday. Cannot WAIT to take them shopping … I’m not sure they’ve seen the locals in the wild yet …